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Quotes from the world of film and movies

I can't listen to that much Wagner. I start getting the urge to conquer 
Poland.
--Manhattan Murder Mystery

The greatest trick the devil ever played was convincing the world he 
didn't exist.
--The Usual Suspects

All human beings are becoming humanoids.
All over the world, not just in America.
We're just getting there faster
since we're the most advanced country.
--Network

Bond: Do you expect me to talk?
Goldfinger: No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to die!
--Goldfinger

My life is passing in front of my
eyes. The worst part is I'm driving a used car.
--Manhattan Murder Mystery

The issue isn't whether you're paranoid,
It's whether you're paranoid enough.
--Strange Days

We're on a mission from God
--The Blues Brothers

The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of
Liberty 
--Crimes and Misdemeanors

The chip.  The British contribution to world cuisine.
--A Fish Called Wanda

If Jesus Christ came back today and saw what was being done in his name, 
he'd never
stop throwing up.
--Hannah and Her Sisters

Hannibal Lecter: How did you catch me, Will?
Will: You had disadvantages.
Hannibal Lecter: What disadvantages?
WIll: You're insane.
--Manhunter

My name is Nick.
My father thought of it shaving
--Top Secret

In the event of war, I'm a hostage.
--Annie Hall

As far as I know, and what I don't
ain't worth knowing.
--Miller's Crossing

Like I've always said, 
If you don't have anything 
nice to say,
come sit by me.
--Steel Magnolias.


(Holding up a picture of a simple circle)
You know, for kids!
--The Hudsucker Proxy

But she was so sweet and we just walked in the park and I was so touched 
by her that,
after fifteen minutes, I wanted to marry her and, after half an hour, I 
completely gave 
up the idea of snatching her purse. --Take The Money and Run "Crash" Davis: Well, I believe in the soul, the cock, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fibre, good Scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone, I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturft and the designated hitter, I believe in the sweet spot, soft core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas Eve and I believe in long slow deep soft wet kisses that last three days. Good night. Annie: Oh my. --Bull Durham You don't wanna get laid, man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you gotta talk to 'em. --Colors Linda Emery: A philosophy major? Now, what can you do with a philosophy major? Bruce Lee: You can think deep thoughts about being unemployed. --Dragon, the Bruce Lee Story Kent: You're all a bunch of degenerates! Chris Knight: Oh, really? Well, what about that time I found you naked with that bowl of jello? Kent: You did not! Chris Knight: This is true. Kent: Yeah, well I was hot and I was hungry! --Real Genius Spider: It's too bad we had to kill her. I really liked the outfit she had on. --Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama Venkman: I'm a little hazy on this good/bad stuff. What exactly is bad? Igon: Imagine life as you know it stopping instantaneously and all the molecules in your body exploding at the speed of light. Venkman:That would be bad. ---Ghostbuster You're acting like a thing from another tax bracket! --Buffy the Vampire Slayer Airline stewardess:Would you like something to drink?- Clark Grizwald: Yeah, I'd like a Coke. Airline stewardess:Would you like that in the Can Clark Grizwald:(looks down the aisle toward bathroom) No I'll just have it right here, thanks. --European Vacation (counting the number of people he has to kill from a long-distance) "1,2,3,4,5,6,7...huh! Oswald was a fag." --The Usual Suspects Nice piano interlude "That's a very beautiful piece, what do you call it?" Rob Reiner "Oh that's a little something I've been fooling around with, I call it, "Lick my love pump" - Nigel Tufnell --This Is Spinal Tap I love the smell of napalm in the morning --Apocalypse Now "What shall we hang, the holly or each other?" -The Lion in WInter "Never apologize, it's a sign of weakness." Spoken by the John Wayne character, Captain Nathan Brittles, in John Ford's "She Wore a Yellow Ribbon. Same movie: Sgt. addressing the troops warning his men to speak cleanly as women will be joining the wagon train. "Watch them words, men!" And from the rear of the assembled troop is heard, "Watch them grammar!" "Shakespeare once said: Life is pretty stupid, with lot's of hubbub to keep you busy, but really not amounting to much...I'm paraphrasing of course." --L.A. Story big tough looking dude (forgot his name): is that supposed to be funny? joker: well, they call me the joker. big tough dude: well i got a joke for you. i'm gonna tear you a new asshole. -Full Metal Jacket Caddyshack: "The one physical model of the universe, the shortest distance between two points is a straight line, in the opposite direction." from Army of Darkness - Evil Ash: "You're good Ash, and I'm bad Ash. You're a goody little two shoes, goody little two shoes, goody little two shoes--" <BLAM! Ash: "Good. Bad. I'm the one with the gun." "bulimia is so '87, Heather." -Heathers "disco" -Pulp Fiction Try not! Do, or do not! There is no try! Empire Strikes Back "What the American Public doesn't know, is exactly what makes them the American Public" - Dan Akroyd in _Tommy Boy_ How about something from "Barton Fink": Barton, handcuffed to his bed by Charlie, aka Mad Man Munt: "Why me?" MMM: Because you... don't... LISTEN! Then of course there's Blade Runner: Roy: "All those memories, lost--likes tears in rain. Time to die." And how bout this from St. Elmo's Fire: Kirby: I always thought we'd be friends forever. Keven: Yeah, well, forever got a lot shorter suddenly, didn't it? "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in awhile, you might miss it." -Ferris Beuller's Day Off "well . . . here's to the pencil pushers. May they all die of lead poison." (Who Framed Roger Rabbit) Harry:"A man can never be friends with a woman he finds attractive, he always wants to have sex with her." Sally:"That's not true! I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved." Harry:"No, you don't" Sally:"Yes, I do." Harry:"No, you don't" Sally:"You're saying I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?" Harry:"No, I'm saying they all want to have sex with you." Sally:"Well, what if they don't want to have sex with you?" Harry:"It doesn't matter because the sex part is already out there, so the friendship is ultimately doomed, and that is the end of the story." Sally:"So a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive?" Harry:"No, you pretty much want to nail them, too" -When Harry Met Sally Chris Knight: I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates who said, "I drank what?" -- Real Genuis Arnold: "I've taught myself how to cook, sew, fix plumbing and even give myself a pat on the back when necessary. The only things I need from anyone is love and respect and anyone who can't give me that has no place in my life" The Mother: "You're throwing me out!?!?" -- Torch Song Trilogy "This isn't personal Kay, it's business." The Godfather - Michael Corleone "If I'm not back in five minutes, wait longer." --Ace Ventura, Pet Detective "When you tell on someone, you're not only telling on them. You're telling on yourself." --Brady Bunch Movie Gee Ricky...I'm really sorry your mom blew up. The doctor says she'll be better in a few weeks. I guess she just won't be able to eat and spicy foods for a while. - Lane Myer - BETTER OFF DEAD "i know what you're thinking, did he fire six shots or only five to tell the truth in all this confusion i forgot myself now being that this is a .44 magnum the most powerful handgun in the world and can take your head clean off, you have to ask yourself a question, do i feel lucky? Well do ya, punk? -Dirty Harry. Josey Wales: "It seems like just when I get to likin' somebody they ain't around very long." Old Indian: "It seems like when you get to dislikin' somebody they ain't around long either." "Of course we can still be friends, just don't call me." - Get Crazy Wanna-be Gunslinger to Clint Eastwood's character: "You don't look no meaner 'n hell cold blooded killer..." Clint: "Yeah, well, I ain't like that no more." -The Unforgiven "I was just nowhere near your neighborhood."-Singles "Are you gonna do something, or are you just gonna stand there and bleed?" -Tombstone Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight? BATMAN Without lamps, there would be no light. --The Breakfast Club "Are you talking to ME?" - Taxi Driver You might know who we are, but we know who you are. Understand. -Goodfellas "You know Keaton says he doesn't believe in God but he fears him. Well I believe in God, but the only thing i fear is Keyser Sosay!" -Verbal Kent in "Usual Suspects" "You gonna bark all day little doggy, or are you gonna bite?" -Mr. Blonde "Reservoir Dogs" "Will you marry me? Do you have any money? Answer the second question first otherwise we'll stop this conversation right hear." -Groucho Marx "Animal Crackers" Richard: "Tommy, back from college in just under a decade." Tommy: "Hey, a lot of people go to college for seven years." Richard: "Yeah, they're called doctors." -"Tommy Boy" i'd rather have a moment of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special -steel magnolias I'll be taking these Huggies, and, uh, whatever cash you got Raising Arizona Billy Madison: Hey Miss Vaughn- Wannt some of this millk? Veronica Vaughn: Billy, this milk belongs to that room. Billy: Oh, nobody has to know about it. This could be our milk. Miss Vaughn: Billy, no milk will ever be our milk. Billy (to custodian): Hey sideburns, want some of this milk? Custodian: I'd rather have a beer Billy Madison Oh, Veronica Vaughn. Soooo hot. Want to touch the heiney. Billy Madison Will you just watch the hair? You know, I work on my hair a long time and you hit it. He hits my hair. Saturday Night Fever Senator, my offer is this: nothing.Not even the price of the gaming license, which I would appreciate if you would put up personally. -- The Godfather We are no longer the knights who say "neep." We are now the nights who say "ickiickiickiickipatangaipboing." -- Holy Grail Lip Balm? -- Three Amigos I like to consider myself an educated man, but I'm afraid I can't speak intelligently on the travel habits of William Santiago. --Few Good men Are you Markinson? same movie It was a glorious time. Wiseguys were everywhere. It was before Appalachia, and before Crazy Joe decided to take on a boss and start a war. It was when I met the world. It was when I first met Jimmy Conway. -- Goodfellas After Annie apologizes for the ways she parks the car, "That's all right. We can walk to the curb from here." Annie Hall Gozer the Traveller - he will come in one of the prechosen forms. During the rectification of the Valdranaii, the traveller came as a large and moving Torr! Then, during the third reconciliation of the last of the Meketrex supplicants they chose a new form for him - THAT OF A GIANT SLORR! Many shubs and zuuls knew what it was to be roasted in the debths of the slorr that day, I can tell you! -Ghostbusters "Long tall sally, she built sweet, she's got everything, uncle john need! Oh baby, oh baby, gonna have me some fun! Gonna have me some fun!" -Predator (Mac, played by bill duke) It's from Star Trek: Generations. When Dr. Soron, played by Malcom McDowell, says to Captain Picard: "They say time is the fire in which we burn. Right now Captain, my time is running out. We leave so many things unfinished in our lives. I know you understand." "Hello, my name is Indigo Montoya, you killed my father, prepare to die! 'The Princess Bride' "I hope you can enjoy the victory with one friggen' eye!!"-The Mask ...evil will always win, because good is dumb! -Dark Helmet, "Spaceballs" "its always dark in the begining." the neverending story "Ah, here it is, So-crates. 'The only true wisdom is in knowing that you know nothing.' That's us, dude." -Ted to Bill from "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" "Who's more foolish? The fool, or the one who follow's him?" -Ben Kenobi form "Star Wars" "The many truths we cling to depend greatly on our point of view." -Ben Kenobi from "Return of the Jedi" "I feel the need; the need for speed!" -Maverick and Goose from "Top Gun" "You should've seen the cover they wanted to do." -Fran Drescher's character to Ian Faith from "This is Spinal Tap" "Women, you can't live with 'em, you can't kill 'em." -Tom Arnold's character from "True Lies" "I'll be back" - Terminator Buyer : "What flavour is it?" Vendor (John Cleese) : "It's a bloody albatross, it hasn't got any flavour! ALBATROSS! ALBATROSS!" Customer : "An argument is a connected series of statements intended to establish a proposition! It's not just saying 'no, it isn't'!" "Pro" arguer : "Yes it is!" Customer : "No it isn't!!" - Monthy Python live in the Hollywood bowl Sometimes I even amaze myself.- Han Solo, Empire Strikes Back "Shit. You shoot me in a dream you better wake-up and apologize." -Reservour Dogs Victims.. Aren't we all? -the Crow "You... your dead! You blew my cover, your dead, you hear me, your dead! The Corps is mother the Corps is father. Your dead Lyta Alexander! We'll find you the Corps will find you!"- Talia to Lyta (after Contorl takes her over), "Divided Loyalties" Men should be like Kleenex- soft, strong and disposable. - Clue If you were happy every day of your life you wouldn't be a human being, you'd be a game show host. HEATHERS "We don't go anywhere. Going somewhere is for squares. We just go." -Marlon Brando The Wild One (1954) "Exterminate all rational thought. that is the conclusion I have come to." - Peter Weller Naked lunch (1991) Jamie Lee Curtis -"You think your an intellectual, don't you ape?" Kevin Kline -"Apes don't read philosophy." Jamie Lee Curtis -"Yes they do Otto, they just don't understand it!" - Jamie Lee Curtis & Kevin Kline A Fish Called Wanda (1988) I belong in a maximum security prison for men!!! AHHH!! -A Pyromaniac's Love Story What... you're crying...there's no crying in baseball...there's no crying in BASEBALL! - Tom Hanks, A league of their own Wyatt Earp says, "I'm coming and Hell's coming with me." - Tombstone Jules: You ever read the Bible, Brett? Brett: (in spasm) Yes. Jules: There's a passage I got memorized, seems appropriate for this situation: Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." -Pulp Fiction "Take me to bed or lose me forever." -Charlie to Maverick in Top Gun. "I wasn't kidding. I do have a test today. It's on European Socialism. What's the big deal? I'm not European. I don't plan on becoming European. So why should I care if they're socialists? They could be facist, anarchist pigs. It still wouldn't change the fact that I don't have a car." --Ferris Bueller (Ferris Bueller's Day Off) Pricipal:"He's been absent NINE times. mom: NINE Times? Principal: NINE Times. Judd Nelson (?) in the Breakfeast club: Ya see this? It's about the size of a cigar burn wouldn't you say? Y'see this is what you get in my house for spilling paint in the garage. Did I stutter?" "After all, there's no point in hurting somebody who doesn't mean anything to you." - Bitter Moon I'd agree with you if you were right. -Awakenings Rhett Butler (to Scarlet O'hara): You need to be kissed, and often, by someone who knows how. Scarlet:You think you are the man to do it? Rhett:No, because that is what you want!!! -Gone With the Wind








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